Plan

Okay. So its my spring break and I'm soooo glad. I needed a break from school, from all those douchebags & bitches. But mostly I need a break so I can effectivly fast. I have flawlessly planned this fast out. Plans help keep ME in control. I need structure and stability. The only time I truly feel in control is when i fast. So here is my plan:

Fast April 4th-15th.

-I have fasted before. I have fasted successfully. 6 days. This is 12 days. Its double the duration of my last fast. I am thinking that since I made it 6 days whats 6 more days? I like to push my body. Plus, I NEED to lose MAJOR lbs. And I will do whatever it takes. I'm tired of being this fatass. I have no choice but to fast to lose this weight. NO CHOICE. This is my last chance to lose weight before 1.)Prom and 2.)Graduation

Prom April 16th. I will eat a lite breakfast. I'm talking lite. Sugar free jello. Eat Lunch, salad-300 calories. Then eat at prom--get my grub on.

April 17th saturday after prom. DO NOT BINGE. Restrict 1000 calories.

April 18th-30. Fuck it, just do it. Its the only way I can lose large numbers in this short amount of time. Its my body. Sacrifice. I am sacrificing this month for the sake of weight loss, so that in May, a hectic month in my life, I can maintain my weightloss and lost 5 more lbs. CONTROL.

May-Restrict 800 a day. Have control. No binges whatsoever. In a 800 cal diet, I can plan out my meals and be full. I need to eat healthy for the month of may b/c I have exams and graduation.

I CAN do this, I MUST do this, I WILL do this.^^^^^

NO other choice. IF I don't fast april then I can't lose the weight. Get the right mindset. Tomorrow is the 1st day of my fast...Its going to be difficult. But I have made a list of things to do to keep me busy and away from food. I have calories in fat cells to live off of, I DON'T NEED FOOD. Fasting gives me soo much stress relief. No worries about gaining weight, no worries about calories, no worries about burning more calories than i ate. Its great. Mental clarity. and #1: WEIGHT LOSS. That should be a good enough reason to do it. Thats my number one goal weight loss. That and control.

Fuck starting tomorrow, I will start tonight. I don't need food. NO more eating tonight. Food is nasty, its greasy clogging my arteries. Fat cells multiplying by the second. No more. I will eat and be happy when I'm thinner on prom day. I am better than food. I have self control it is precious. No more double chin...that will be my mantra.

Starts now.